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Day 13: Feeling Raw

January 13, 2019 by Tracy 18,483 Comments

It’s Sunday and I am feeling a little raw. Raw is my way of saying emotional.

This week, we aired Gerry Friesen’s episode about his journey with stress, anxiety and depression with farming. It was soooo well received by our audience getting comments, shares and being watched/listened to more in the first couple days than some episodes get after being live for a month or more.

What does this mean to me? First off, I am happy that we picked a message that is impacting and adding value to our audience. Mental health is a huge concern in the agriculture community! Secondly, I am happy that Gerry has been able to share his tough journey and use it to make a positive difference in the lives of others. Third, as a publisher this episode has done well to broaden our reach with farmers. This is what we want.

Now, I sit here and I reflect. The success of the episode makes me happy, however, it also makes me sad in equal parts. The fact that one of our most popular episodes is on mental health goes to show you how big the problem is.

Personally and professionally, I know so many people that have mental health concerns and it breaks my heart! Why? Really, why does this have to be a thing? I wish on the stars above that this could just go away. They say 1 in 3 people will suffer from mental healths concerns at some point in their lives. That is so sad that 1/3 of our population suffers.

I immediately want to fix it! Sometimes I think I am “like a man” with my desire to fix things. I now know enough to know, that I cannot fix the problems of others. I realize it but it’s frustrating though! Why can’t I wave a wand and take everyone’s problens away?

I know that all I can do is listen and encourage others as needed. All I can do is try and be a light in a world that needs it! When I remember this and rise out of my self focused day to day life, I realize how important it is for me to show up for others. I need to look up from my well worn day to day path and see the need in others. Truthfully it’s often written right there on their face if you look deep enough. I remember, that I need to reach out to congratulate and pat others on the back. As a business owner and show host, no one pats me on the back. I know that I need to self pat! Everyone is so self focused. I understand that so many people are busy with their heads down trying to make ends meet and make it through challenging life situations. I slowly start to realize that no one appoints you as that person, you just need to put your hand up, own that role and start championing others. So many people need a champion and I need to be that! I have the good fortune, personality, influence and platform to do it.

As I rise and fall on this journey, I give myself Grace. I realize it’s hard to stay centered when I have my own day to day business and life concerns. I often slip back into my bubble and re-emerge when life bops me on the head with a reminder of those that need me. I muster up my grit and rise again. I notice the fact that each time I rise up, I Rise up yet another step higher towards becoming that person that I want to be. That is something worth celebrating indeed!

Today, I received two bops on the head and that is likely why I am feeling so raw. My Dad ended up in the hospital for heart concerns this evening and the second bop was someone sharing how much they are struggling. The bops reminded me of how I was putting work at the top of my priority pinnacle as always and letting myself off the hook on being the best daughter and friend that I could be, all because I am a busy business person. I don’t buy it. There are plenty busier and more important people that give way more to others than I do.

It reminds me that “I cannot help everyone, but everyone can help someone.”

So that being said, I give myself Grace today, and starting tomorrow, I muster up my grit to become an even better; wife, daughter, daughter in law, sister, niece, cousin, friend and boss.

Your very raw feeling friend,

Tracy

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